gr here. had been so bz with training that i dun even hv time to set my hands on the com. noone views it anyway. so sometime it doesnt matter whether there is a post anot. training today. again. played poorly and well. poorly at 1st but better ltr. dun feel like playing at 1st. dunno y as well. so dragged zhi hong down with me. so sry la. then another match played better. u cant win everything. neither can u always win. yea. so i'm not all that confident sometimes. lol no one knows. so it doesnt matter. haha! and and my backhand is !@#!@#. gotta improve it soon. trainings coming to an end and hope our match with fuhua on friday turns out gd.collecting money is a chore mannn.. dun even know if the sec 1s know bout it. ther r kind anti social. it doesnt work if u r only gd at bmt and sux at socialising. and yea, so troublesome and vexing sometimes when i hv so much on my mind, so many stuff to rmb and to do. i wanna go out tml. but mum wans me to go to popular with her. and it doesnt seemed nice to reject her. so many things happened and now kinship means alot to me. especially my mum. so what if ur mum owns a company and speak perfect english. so what if she can drives and give u loads of money. my mum is great in her own ways as well. and those ppl out there, u dun need to know. u cant buy love thats for sure.i hope someone gets a clue of what i'm talking bout next and get a life.u hv to die to learn how to live. ever wondered if u would go the nxt day ? and that u haven even done anything to influence the ppl around u. and haven done anything to the society and stuff. r u still studying all day long just for that piece of cert with straight As. straight As cant be exchanged for a loved one. r u still playing games, mapling 24/7 just to get to the highest rank in maple ? pay for maple cash to look cool in a virtual world when u can actually do much more meaningful things with that money. you OUGHT to get some meaning into your life.so what if i scored 7 As for the first time in my life. it doesnt bring back my loved one. slogged so hard just for that sheer moment of joy and proudness. it all seemed meaningless now. live with a meaning. but i'm glad i got that piece of results. it made me realise that results aint everything. but it proved that i'm able to do so if i set my mind to it. i studied so hard just so that when u probe bout anything, i can do something to help instead of seeing u struggle, denying that u dun understand at the same time. but now it doesnt matter anymore. it's not the same anymore. absence makes the heart grow fonder ? it doesnt happen to both the party everytime. what crap. but i dun care, imma try all i can to get back to how we were in the past and hopefully i'm not denied this chance even in my last graduating year. bless me with this chance to be able to use my knowledge and what i can offer to help in some ways. and with that, i can live with a meaning. start by contributing to the ppl around u, offering what u hv, then the society. find meaning and joy in the tasks u do. and u wun be half awake chasing materialistic things. like higher lvl or better results. more is good, thats the wrong culture. u'll nv get enough of chasing these kinda things.i too sometimes get pessimistic and think that how come things happening this way and start feeling sorry for yourself. but that doesnt last long, the nxt moment i must break away from this self pity and start again. it's impt for me, in bmt as well. to calm down and start again once i made a mistake. accpet the past as past, without denying it or discarding it.life's unfair to everyone. so in a way, it's fair since it happens to everyone. i dun get money all the time, i dun get new clothes once a wk or a gd meal everyday. but, i'm happy and i m able to make others feel the same as well, dun u just envy that. so start getting a life and stop wasting your time. life's not that long, before u know it, it might be over alr.dun assume that it's too late to get involved.one last thing (it's getting late and i'm tired)learn to forgive others and forgive yourself.to err is human.to forgive others is a hard task. but taking revenges on each other, it will nv end. so y not give in and forgive others. before it's too late. and u might not even get the chance.alright i'm really tired already. hope someone really read this post and tag on the board.lol. cya.thx to tues with morrie for helping me understand this much. i pity those who read the bk without learning anything.Guorong. <3> posted by GuoRong Thursday, December 14, 2006 . . .
